A few hours ago as I’m on my way to the gym I feel the extreme compulsion for coffee. The urge was so demanding that I drove completely out of my way to make coffee at my boyfriend’s house (in this insane $3.66 a gallon society we live in), before I went to the gym. Who has to drink coffee before working out? This has to be terrible for me, but I still feel extraordinarily compelled to ingest copious amount of caffeine before I work out every time. In fact I need at least a double shot of espresso just to get through a shift, or four shots if it’s a Saturday night. Minimum.
I’m sick, I need help. My teeth are going to blacken and fall out of my head into what used to be my stomach, but now, with a growing hole being burned into it, the only thing holding my stomach in place is the bulbous ulcer pressing into by quickly dissolving intestinal lining. Help me, please, somebody…
Hey, I indentify. First off, let me plug Crest White Strips-they work wonders. Secondly, I too have at least four shots of espresso a day. I 100% am with you on this. We’re going to die.
Update: I reviewed my bank account last night. Now? Now I am forcing myself to now drink the free, cheap, horribly disgusting office coffee at work because after balancing my bank statement I realized I have spent $45 on lattes in the past two work weeks.
I have a espresso machine at work AND a little one at home now (thank you John’s parents…) so I’m good in that department.
um…where is my friend?